MrsJoseph: Books, Life & Wine

Written erotica has been around for ages. I remember reading a couple of my father’s eroticas while in middle school (or younger!). During those days, erotica (at least, what I saw) was written and marketed primarily to men.

[Quite] some time later (about 1999), Tina Engler (Jaid Black) started writing and trying to sell erotica. Being constantly rebuffed, Engler started her own business to start selling her erotic romance fiction under the pen name Jaid Black. By 2001, Engler’s site was up and running – making Ellora’s Cave one of (if not the) first ebook erotica bookstore.

Erotica has come a long, long way since the opening of Ellora’s Cave and the publishing of Engler’s first novels. The cheesy covers have started to fade away, the language has changed, the plots have become increasingly complicated. Erotica has become…mainstream.

Every now and again as I scroll through my book catalog, I get a yearning for some old skool erotica. The erotica where anal sex never hurts, all women have huge, sensitive breasts and the plot is [almost always] secondary to the sex.

Which brings me to this book, lol. Warlord by Jaid Black. Now, just take a full moment to marvel at that cover. They don’t make them like this anymore. ^.^

Warlord is – I think – one of the better specimens from the early days of erotica. Published in 2001, Warlord hit a lot of consumer markers: the book includes time travel, Scotsmen, bad Scottish “accents” written in worse Scottish dialect, kidnapping, an alpha hero and lots of (hilarious) sex.

I’m excited! Let’s get started!

Warlord starts in 1052 A.D. at the estate of the Donald, Euan. Euan has just beheaded a man, the leader of the Hay clan, because the Hay’s daughter was betrothed to Euan but she ran off with another man.

Warm snuggles yet? No?

The Donald decided that since he still needed a wife, he would get her by “reiving” women (stealing) from the Hay’s clan. With that thought, Euan and his brothers rode out that very night.

The book then jumps to Scotland, present day. The heroine, Janet, is out with her friend Morag when they somehow time travel from the future to 1052 A.D. Janet and her friend are scooped up by Euan and his clansmen, bundled off to a priest and married…all before any discussion takes place. All Janet knows is that she’s time traveled, been kidnapped and doesn’t speak the language. And speaking of language, Morag’s dialect and Euan’s dialect are…remarkably similar (and terrible) though they are at least 1,000 years apart.

“Aye,” he confirmed, grinning a bit at the memory of he and Janet pointing towards themselves and pronouncing their names as slowly as lackwits. He quelled the small smile, his features quickly shifting back in place. “I dinna ken from where they come, but ‘tis sorely apparent they do no’ comprehend a word of what I’m speaking tae them.”
– Euan

“I can no’ stand to be with Stuart, Janet.” Morag threw a lock of red hair over her shoulder. “Did I say he’s no’ as bad as my brothers? Ha! He is a thousand times worse!”
–Morag

I have to say, Janet’s reaction one she realized that Euan married her was…one of my favorite moments in fiction, lol. Well, not really but it’s still pretty funny.:)

After marriage, Janet and her new husband Euan immediately have sex. The two have married and exchanged names but nothing else. Strangely enough, Janet is able to accurately decipher the meaning of Euan’s words when they are smexing:

“Leamsa.”

He growled out that word again, the word he had used the last time he’d fucked her, the word he was even now repeating over and over again as he rubbed her wet flesh.

Mine. Janet somehow understood that leamsa meant mine. Her body reacted to his possessiveness, her nipples hardening and her breath quickening.

I found the sex to be…not that hot. I read this book for the first time many years ago so I can’t remember if I thought it was hot back in the day. I DO remember thinking it was weird that the author set it up so that Janet was the first person to perform fellatio on her new husband. I was thinking, no way in hell that they didn’t get the dick sucked – no matter how far in the past the book is set. I do know that fellatio was depicted on art work going back as far as 500 B.C., so…

Two of the tropes that Black relied upon heavily in this book was [what I and some others term] “insta-lust” and “insta-love.” This is when the heroine and hero are just so enamored of each other that they fall instantly in love and lust with no real reason for this to have happened. In Warlord, Janet and Euan are in romantic love and lust for each other within 5 days. While barely speaking a word to each other. My lord! I wish it was that easy to start and build a relationship! This did not really bother me when I first read Warlord. It wasn’t as heavily used a trope as it is today. When I first read Warlord, it felt like “love at first sight” instead of “insta-love” (which are different from each other, just hard to describe, lol).

The book doesn’t have much plot to it so it’s pretty much over after Janet and Euan marry. There is a bit more sex and a minor Big Mis that is quickly resolved before the ending. I really enjoyed this book – for what it is. I can’t take away any “points” for this book being corny because erotica was a little corny back then. Plus, I’ve read worse. Waaaay worse, lol.

3 Stars!